Dr. Clay Cook is the John and Nancy Peyton Faculty Fellow in Child and Adolescent Wellbeing at the University of Minnesota and Associate Professor in the School Psychology Program. Clay co-founded the School Mental Health Assessment, Research and Training (SMART) Center at the University of Washington and is a core faculty member within the Institute of Translational Research in Children’s Mental Health at the University of Minnesota. In addition to his research, he consults with several school and community systems throughout the US to improve practices and outcomes for students to meet the demands of civic, work, and home life.
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We tell the story of how the debate about social media and well-being has evolved.
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In this video I discuss the importance of social well being, social connections, social relationships and social interactions with other people. I also discuss social relationships and health, and how social media is bad, and good for you.
Transcript (partial with notes)
Social connections
If you talk to someone that has recently moved, started a new job, or retired, and ask them what they miss most about their past situation, one of the most common answers is that they miss the people that were in their life. What that actually means is that they miss the social connections or relationships they had with those people.
Social well being, social connections or social interactions with other individuals is crucial to mental health, which in turn is crucial to overall health. The lack of social connections has shown to increase stress hormones, weaken the immune system, and lessen cardiovascular functions. People who are lonely tend to consume more alcohol, exercise less, have less quality sleep, and fatigue easily.
Social relationships allow you to share your achievements, and have support when times are tough. Imagine achieving a long term goal you had, what is the first thing you want to do, tell someone, share your accomplishment with friends and family of course.
Or imagine if something terrible happened. Not having someone to lean on and talk to, can make that event linger, and make you feel even more isolated.
Giving support in relationships can be more beneficial than receiving support. When someone shares something positive in their life with you, it is a compliment.
They wanted you to be a part of their success, and they know that you have a sincere interest in their life. And when someone shares a tragedy in their life, you know they really trust you, and they are looking to you to help them through this difficult time.
Some social relationships can be bad. A person that is constantly negative and has a poor outlook can bring you down, causing you stress, and negatively affect your mood.
Someone that always talks about themselves, and makes all of your interactions about them, is not really a social connection. In that case you are just an audience member in their one person show on how wonderful their life is.
Poor marital or relationship quality can also weaken the immune system, and erode physical health. Dealing with the stress from a poor relationship can lead to over consuming food or alcohol, smoking, or taking medications to deal with the stress, which in turn can damage systems in the body.
Connections through social media can be beneficial, by allowing you to stay in touch with friends and family at distant locations, however, social media connections are not a good alternative for face to face in person contact.
And too much time spent on social media can lead to more isolation and a greater feeling of loneliness. It is a good practice to use social media in moderation.
To be healthy we need people in our lives, it doesn’t need to be 5000 facebook friends, and we don’t have to have everyone like us. Having strong social relationships with just a few people is fine.
A few people that we can share life’s good and bad moments with, a few people that we can connect with on a regular basis, with no stress, and no judgments, a few people who accept us for who we are.
See what wellbeing means to the children we spoke to. For more information on this and other children’s health topics, visit: http://bit.ly/1OuE87y
